Archive for the ‘twitter attack’ Category

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Twitter Attack Round 2: FUNNIEST SIRI TWEETS. Siri, where’s the iPhone 5?

October 5, 2011

Siri apple iphone 4SNow this is some Twitter-Funny, wait no – Twitter magic! Thank you Apple for pissing off the iPhone… uh… iPholks… and introducing Siri!

FUNNIEST SIRI TWEETS

Dave Zatz
davezatzDave Zatz
Siri: Where is the iPhone 5?
kowsik
pcaprkowsik
@phillryu: Siri on an AT&T connection is going to be like having a passive aggressive, half-deaf butler.” <- LMAO!
Damian @ Brightstar
DamianOS3Damian @ Brightstar
Siri, where am I? And why am I not wearing any pants?”
Ross Jamieson 
Ross_JamiesonRoss Jamieson 
Siri, find me local drug dealers in order of highest ratings.
Josh Gates
joshuagatesJosh Gates
Siri: Cutting edge technology voiced by a 1980 Speak and Spell.
Chad Darnell
ChadDarnellChad Darnell
Siri” is awfully close to “Suri.” I think you know what I mean.
Ben Kadamus
benkadamusBen Kadamus
#iphone4s quote of the day via @Gizmodo: “Siri? That looks like the most amazing thing I’ll never use.”
bennomatic
bennomaticbennomatic
Siri, how much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?
Dan Smith
AbuliatronixDan Smith
I just spared you from me trying to make an iPhone “Siri“/Scientology “Suri” joke. #YoureWelcome
Trevor MacSwain
lifeis11Trevor MacSwain
@jbalinski: Siri: I think i have a crush on you.” I just want to be friends, Joe.
Ryan Irvine
ryanirvineRyan Irvine
Siri, what’s the name for the type of autism that makes some people tweet at their local Starbucks?
Andrew Nesbitt
AndrewNezAndrew Nesbitt
When I get an iPhone 4S I’m looking forward to asking Siri the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow.
ScrappinCop
ScrappinCopScrappinCop
RT @robyn_sparkles: Will siri be able to understand me when I’m drunk?
Rylie L.
Thinking of changing my name to Siri so more men will be interested in me.
Phil Thompson
PhillyThompPhil Thompson
Apple’s Siri will never work with my accent! Me: “Message my wife I’ll be late.” Phone: “Massage your wifi on a date.”
Kyle Van Essen
kyleveKyle Van Essen
Siri, tweet ‘Poopin’.” “Tweeting ‘Pooping’.” The future is now.
rstevens
rstevensrstevens
Siri, given enough time to prepare, could Batman defeat Galactus?
Ben Parr
benparrBen Parr
Ask Siri about Skynet, and it will electrocute you and drive your car over a cliff. Try it, I dare you. #iPhone4S
Prince Charles
Charles_HRHPrince Charles
Oops, that was close. Testing new voice command app. Almost wiped out France. #siri #letstalkiphone

Thanks for stopping by!

@richandDaveshow

FACEBOOK US HERE!

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I’m bitterly disappointed that every aspect of the iPhone 4S is dramatically better than its predecessor except its shape.</sarcasm>

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Twitter Attack: iPhone 4S Funniest Tweets and iSnark

October 4, 2011

apple iphone 4SWOW – the Twitterverse was ruthless… well more like sad, sullen and cranky when their hopes and dreams for a magical iPhone 5 faded away into the boredom of Tim Cook’s sleep inducing keynote. Yep, all we got was a stupid new camera, stupid new artificial intelligence and a stupid new “free pass” for downloading illegal, sorry – shared, music.

Stupid magic.

Anyway, here’s the funny and the snarky from Twitter on Apple’s new(ish) iPhone…

TWEETS DURING APPLE KEYNOTE >

HAL 9000
HAL9000_HAL 9000
iPhone has declared war on Hallmark. “We’re so sorry for your bankruptcy”
Richard Cobbett
New iPhone feature – Snap a picture of tasty food, have ingredients delivered straight to your fridge. “We call it Kitchen Sync,” says Cook.
Richard Stelling
ANYONE NOT LIVE BLOGGING THE IPHONE EVENT PLEASE GET OFF THE INTERNET WE NEED THE BANDWIDTH!
aj rafael
this will be the biggest fake out if they release an iPhone 5 at this point… they’re announcing way too much old stuff… gahhhhhh
David Strack
Apple is stalling, the new iPhone isn’t ready. Waiting for a sweaty, out-of-breath engineer to bust onto the stage and say “HERE IT IS!”
Andy Ihnatko
Backup. Fnd My iPhone. seen this b4. But! “Find My Friends” is new: tells you when your pals are nearby. “The Fugitive” now over in 10 min.
Noah Kravitz
Set an iPhone up / Without a PC / Like every other smartphone / Has always allowed me?
Ronnie fieg
Leatherbacks > iPhone 4S tupid
Snaggy
I’ll be chaining an iPhone to my keys, and using it for Find My Keys.
Srivathsan G.K
Richard Cobbett
richardcobbettRichard Cobbett
New iPhone feature – Snap a picture of tasty food, have ingredients delivered straight to your fridge. “We call it Kitchen Sync,” says Cook.
RT : The iPhone 4S comes with an inbuilt “Sue Samsung” app.
Jose H. Flores
RT : “The new iPhone is so fast that you can virtually tweet and text at the same time,” is what he should’ve said….
Gizmodo
iPhone 4S: world phone with both GSM and CDMA built in
Rob Keyes
lol RT : “We heard you liked the iPhone 4, so we released it again. This strategy worked for The Lion King. We will try it as well”
Engadget
6 Hours 3G browsing, only 9 on WiFi? Less than last year’s rated 10 hours WiFi.
Christina Warren
The world phone aspect of the iPhone 4S shouldn’t be underestimated.
Mallory Colliflower
This will be the iPhone cycle that I skip.
Amy-Mae Elliott
Does the iPhone *need* a better camera? I’d be really interested to hear from iPhotographers on this.
Jason Tucker
1080p video on the iPhone, better come in a 64gig/128gig version
Juan Sosa
So now there making a poor mans iPhone…great now Section 8 people can afford it
Michael Eck
Really!? All this hype for the ‘new’ iPhone 4.1 with the same design…
Zach Carter
MT yes it does. RT No 4g data speeds in new iPhone=fail. better battery/processor doesn’t make up for it.
Rodrigo Javier
FLASH: Apple shares are down about 3% following unveiling of iPhone 4S
The Dark Lord
the iphone 5 is not exciting. In a few months it’ll get less attention than Colin Creevy’s murder in Deathly Hallows.
Fayek Helmi
they should’ve named Siri “Spock” that would make every single geek on the planet buy the iphone no matter what! “how’s the weather spock?”
Joe Lee
Welcome to the world of the iPhone 4asS – only asses would think this is groundbreaking technology. *yawn*
A City in CO
RT : So can black girls ask their iPhone: “Is my weave laid today?” || !!!!!!
SABREPULSE
i’m not buying the new iphone unless it’s semi-modular and has wooden sidepanels
iAm Me
The new iPhone is disappointing, no toaster or drinks holder on it? Rubbish
umair haque
It’s simple. There is no iPhone 5 because there is no future.
Mark Pack
So new iPhone makes getting weather forecasts easy. Which would be great if they were accurate.
Хроники редакции
— I’ve been talking to the new iPhone. — And? — It hates me.
umair haque
People. When I said “It’s simple. There is no iPhone 5 because there is no future.” — it was a…joke. WTF.
Andrew Girdwood
Someone ask Siri when the iPhone 5 launch will be.
Judy Goya Jetson
So I herd there is no iPhone 5 its just iPhone 4s ..lol
Anne-Marie Guarnieri
OMG ROBOTS ARE GOING TO CONTROL OUR LIVES. Also: bring it. RT More Features of Siri, Voice Control on iPhone nyti.ms/pbqZzl
Gus Pinto
guspintoGus Pinto
Siri “Where’s the iPhone 5?”
E.J. Coughlin
iPhone 4S – “The Siri virtual assistant interfaces directly with Wolfram Alpha – two things you won’t use in one convenient package”
Christopher Seavor
conkerhimselfChristopher Seavor
iPhone 4S(lighty different)
Annette Gonzalez
amgoAnnette Gonzalez
Oh shiiiiiii Sprint’s getting the new iPhone? Might be time to switch. I dig their plans.
call me Dee ♥
YoNipplesHairycall me Dee ♥
the iPhone is overrated. androids are better.
Forever Shan
ForevershanForever Shan
RT @AshIsAmazin: Why yall disappointed in the new iPhone? What were you expecting, it to have wings?
tk102570
tk102570tk102570
Watching Chris Pirillo streaming about the new iPhone. I think he’s about to have a heart attack over his excitement over the new iPhone.
Paul Stamatiou
StammyPaul Stamatiou
My usual iPhone upgrade policy: Wait for the next one or until I crack the front glass (already cracked the back glass).
ShortFormBlog
shortformblogShortFormBlog
“Warm bath of sadness”: The #WSJ way of describing today’s #iphone event. WTF? bit.ly/rb9mTu
Rich Pedine
reekyrocksRich Pedine
from what i can tell its a good thing i didnt care about the big iphone announcement today :)
Dane Cook
danecookDane Cook
If you are a tech site who, for the last 6 months, has posted next gen iPhone “rumor roundups” please go swallow a knife.
NEW!!! TWEETS FROM AFTER THE KEYNOTE! >>
Pablo Elizalde
EliGPPablo Elizalde
In fairness, I can see why you would want to upgrade to a dual-core iPhone. Who wants to wait a full second to load Angry Birds
nilay patel
recklessnilay patel

Feel pretty stupid about getting punked like that — my apologies. But hey, iPhone 4S, right? What’s up with that, yo?
ObviouslyBenBen Hughes
I will not rest until I find a way to turn the voice of “Siri” on the iPhone 4S into the voice of @TobyTurner‘s Stephen. #BESTASSISTANTEVER
Peter Cohen
flargh Peter Cohen
I’m bitterly disappointed that every aspect of the iPhone 4S is dramatically better than its predecessor except its shape.</sarcasm>
Michael Pierce
OverlandParker Michael Pierce
I’m a huge fan of Apple, but I have to say that I’m a little disappointed that the new iPhone 4S can’t even clone sheep.
MoneyEd
EDPoloLoco MoneyEd
@Ambitious_IAM Wat is the new iPhone suppose to do?”i heard it has a telepathy app
Simon Says
simoncowart Simon Says
RT @TheFix: Serious question: Do I buy the “new” iPhone or wait until the 5 comes out? // I’m waiting for the five for superficial reasons
Reuben Mourad
ReubenMourad Reuben Mourad
Spending the morning with my iPhone and a pair of sharp scissors, scratching an “S” into the back of it. I’m so cool and up to date.

Thanks for stopping by!

@richandDaveshow

FACEBOOK US HERE!

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Twitter Attack Charlie Sheen: Funniest Tweets, Links, YouTube Video, Trends

March 3, 2011

TWITTER ATTACKS ARE BACK! First up, our good friend & coke fiend man whore Charlie. Enjoy.

 

#winning

Oh ssssssssssnap! @Bronxzooscobra is after @charliesheen

Cobra_normal
BronxZoosCobra: According to the rules of Twitter, I think I’m supposed to announce a multi-city comedy tour now. Right @ConanOBrien@CharlieSheen?
about 1 hour ago via web
Cobra_normal
BronxZoosCobra: Dear @CharlieSheen, know what’s better than tiger’s blood? Cobra venom. #winning #snakeonthetown Also I’m 20 inches long. Just sayin’.

More on @bronxzooscobra here Sheen links & videos worth clickity click click clicking…

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*New from @jimmyfallon

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Bettywhite1_normal
BettyFckinWhite: Coming soon: Charlie Sheen’s Tiger Blood 10,000 Hour Energy Drink. Tastes like winning! #tigerblood

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RSimpson20: RT @NMEmagazine: Charlie Sheen gets a million Twitter followers in one day http://dlvr.it/J8Zsv
half a minute ago via dlvr.it

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Mollywebsize_0468retouch_normal
mollywood: Whatever, iPad. Look at this. Charlie Sheen quotes as New Yorker cartoons. So genius I almost can’t process it. http://bzfd.it/grVeur
about 18 hours ago via web

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L07jd_normal
sarahksilverman: My thoughts and prayers are with Charlie Sheen tonight, as he’s been diagnosed with Full Blown Busey
about 8 hours ago via Who Say
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48823_1477175943_7368_n_normal
ARPHOTO: Somewhere in America about 25 drug dealers already named their product “Charlie Sheen“.
16 minutes ago via web

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Weiners_normal
timbotown: Please use Bullet Train wreck when referring to Charlie Sheen. Normal diesel speed will not do justice to his collision.
16 minutes ago via HootSuite
 

 

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_8197_6142_red_earrings_final_normal
joan_rivers: All this @charliesheen news reminds me of seeing “Inception.” I have no idea what the hell is going on, but can’t wait to see how it ends.
about 18 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

 

 

 

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Random Charlie Sheen Quote Generator The Charlie Sheen Guide to Passing  Job Interview

Careful out there, ‘cuz remember, you are what you tweet!

@richandDaveshow

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APPLE IPAD: Tweets, Spoofs, Bombs and TWITTER TREND

January 27, 2010

Bookmark and Share

The New Apple iPad

The New Apple iPad

WOW the iPad has set off a Twitter storm! So we’re giving you a little bit of EVERYTHING! Here are some of the funniest iPad tweets, bitches and spoofs! Followed by top related Twitter trends like… wait for it…

“iTampon” < WOW! SERIOUSLY!

Plus check out the new line of iParty, iGolf & iSand gear!

L_b6d8deb0217241ceaae2a70f5ff824c5_normal
jroood: RT @soulpancake: RT @avivhadar: Anyone in Boston… Can you tell a difference when someone says iPad or iPod?
9 minutes ago from Seesmic · Reply · View Tweet
Twitterprofilephoto_normal
CmfcknW: RT @ac_money RT @brittaniheather I hope the groundhog leaves its burrow on Tuesday, I can’t take six more weeks of iPad jokes.
7 minutes ago from Power Twitter · Reply · View Tweet
Izzy_blue_normal
IzzyNeis: Hmm. Ipad, you are interesting and clever. I would drop and break you, sadly, before I’d even be able to call you mind. KID PROOF?
less than 20 seconds ago from TweetDeck · Reply · View Tweet
——
iParty too much plain BLK shirt
iParty too much plain BLK by twitterfunny
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4258_1087010573426_1171272027_30212444_844209_n_normal
RachelGibsonUSA: so really the ipad is for people who have more money than they know what to do with. #brats Whats the point? ooh (with your hands) so!!!
less than 20 seconds ago from web · Reply · View Tweet
266183595_rr8jc-l_normal
YOURBOYEDDIE: So anybody want to buy me an iPad?
less than 20 seconds ago from web · Reply · View Tweet
Rooftop Comedy
RooftopComedy

RT @wendymolyneux I’m already going through like 4 or 5 iPads a day because of my heavy workflow.#obviousjokecitypopulationme #apple

Craver013_b_normal
ispringforward: RT @fastcompany: iPad not the first choice for women. Period. http://bit.ly/dAvVsV (expand) Love it!
4 minutes ago from HootSuite · Reply · View Tweet
Mabel_02_normal
MMontalvo: ( : RT @parisiensalon: The new iPad was definitely designed for women in mind. It comes in 3 sizes: regular, super and maxi.
2 minutes ago from UberTwitter · Reply · View Tweet
Keidra1web_normal
kdc: for real. RT @erinjshea What he said: RT @steverubel: Google Social Search launch is far more important game-changing news than the iPad.
less than 20 seconds ago from web · Reply · View Tweet
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joeltelling: RT @matthickey: I am hereby renaming my iPhone the iPad Nano. #toosoon?
7 minutes ago from Twidget · Reply · View Tweet
Danbrownbrett_normalNye_me_normal
bsandusky: @KristinaWeise @markmilian iPad Expert = Social Media Expert. It’ll be in bios everywhere soon.

less than 20 seconds ago from HootSuite · Reply · View Tweet · Thread Show Conversation

———–

Feast your eyes upon…

iPad 2D - NEWEST iPod iPhone from Apple??? click to buy!

With tablet-like features it’s viewing area is an astonishing 5.5″ x 8.5″ and some are saying the iPad 2D could be the next version of the iPhone or the rumored Apple Tablet.

  • Send email and text messages using advanced USPS technologies.
  • Flexible flat screen display 5.5″ x 8.5″
  • Touch screen changes “pages” with simple flicking motion.
  • Keep track of contacts, calendar and notes! Wireless sync with other devices using a touch-typing system.
  • Many drawing tools already available in virtually every color!
  • Guaranteed not to freeze or crash ever!
  • No power source!
  • Pen not included.

———-

Default_profile_2_normal
NebuK42: everyone’s ranting about that iPad … i’ll officially declare that i don’t give a damn :P
9 minutes ago from tircd · Reply · View Tweet
Twitterprofilephoto_normal
nikhilk: @davidebbo no flash on iPad is ok by me… but no camera? I expected iPad to be an iPhone+
less than 20 seconds ago from web · Reply · View Tweet
Twitter-profile_normal
desipiodotcom: The new iPad features are so underwhelming that I will not be buying one in March. I will probably wait until April.
less than 20 seconds ago from TwitterGadget · Reply · View Tweet
Sp_head_232x231_trans_normal
magurski: RT @EFF: “”The Case Against The iPadhttp://eff.org/r.f93” — that didn’t take long
less than 20 seconds ago from Twirssi · Reply · View Tweet
WTF?!?!? No lady, keep waiting for the iSlate>>>
Anubis_twitter_normal
TempleofAnubis: @kripster Is the ipad the same as the anticipated islate? Forgive me all this tech is getting confusing! Are they the same thing?
less than 20 seconds ago from web · Reply · View Tweet
Here you go, as promised… the Twitter trends of the day:
  • iTamponPeople are making a joke due to unfortunate word associations in the name of Apple’s new tablet, the iPad (Jan. 27).
  • HaitiThe country was hit by a 7.0 magnitude earthquake. People are tweeting to organize relief efforts or relay news.
  • Ugly BettyABC is canceling the comedy-drama, effective at the end of this, the fourth, season (Jan. 27).
  • iPhonePeople are tweeting comparisons of the iPhone and newly announced iPad.
  • UnionUS President Barack Obama will be delivering a State of the Union address today (Jan. 27).
  • kindle
  • Steve Jobs

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Be careful out there ‘cuz you are what you tweet!

@RichandDaveShow

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