Hey Baby, Nice Tweets! They’re so BIG! 11/21November 21, 2008
We skipped a week, so lots of tweets today! Here you go, the funniest tweets in our twucking twitter tweed!
birbigs just finished his cardio-kickboxing class, does anyone want to fight?
nick In this crazy non-heteronormative world, how do you define sex? It’s whatever the people are doing two-thirds of the way through the porno.
girlarsonist Dear Mr. Kudlow; I really do like you, but next time you try to dress yourself, please call me before leaving the house. That is all.
RodBegbie “This corporation has a very strict ‘bros before hos’ policy.”
nick Just found out that Easter 2009 is on my birthday. Time to plan my theme party.
SlapSticDotCom I just got a steroid shot in my butt. Hello, buns of steel.
TheOnion BREAKING: Senate Black Caucus Disappears Without Trace
kpereira I can’t watch CNN anymore. They’re trying so hard to be witty and entertaining when all I really want them to do is REPORT THE DAMN NEWS!
toiletscribble I haven’t touched my twitter in ages. Ahhhhh this feels nice.
fimoculous “You have 87 friends in common.” I really doubt that.
hodgman And you’re right: I should have had a martini with that. I will rectify that tomorrow morning.
Chuckumentary Like any good newsman, I believe that if you’re not scared, I’m not doing my job.
bricomedy Fact: Two men are installing carpeting in my home, but one of them will only refer to the other using various girls names.
RodBegbie I prefer the taste of Rockstar or Red Bull to that of Bawls, but I *do* enjoy the opportunity to do childish innuendo about “my bawls”.
TheBloggess Message from twitter: “God is following you.” Oh, hell
bricomedy Overwhelmed and disoriented. Perfect.
StupidInstitute What’s the grace period before doing a “Where are they now?” special on Sarah Palin?
michael_bay Started a fan group. It’s called the North American Michael Bay Love Association. Or just NAMBLA.
nick Okay, you can fuck me. But seriously, the horse I rode in on? You perv.
nick PR lady, you invited me to this women’s social network, so I’ll drop your name when they ask why I’m tagging everyone “ANAL MILF.”
nick Writing for the older audience at PC Mag is a blast. “Hey guys! It’s called Facebook and it’s about to ROCK YOUR WORLD.”
SlapSticDotCom Quote of the day: Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them. -unknown